i hope my new Secret Keeper does not yield to lousy conscience.

just as a precautionary measure though, i think i will hypnotize you.

YOU CANNOT TELL ANYONE.
YOU HAVE NO MOUTH.
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A LARYNX.
YOU SPEAK ONLY URDU.
YOU CAN ONLY SAY "THE BUBBLES ARE SO BRAVE."
ANY OTHER WORD YOU SPEAK HAS TO BE FOLLOWED BY 87 SIGHS UNTIL LUNGS ARE EXPELLED THROUGH BUCCAL CAVITY.
YOU ARE A SNOWFLAKE.
NASI BRIYANI PWNS.
ONCE YOU STOP BEING HYPNOTIZED YOU WILL BECOME A JAPANESE PENIS, OR AN APHID.




hmmm ok i guess that settles your hazardous existence now i can be at peace again.